tavie.com

Today I got an email with my login information and federal return receipt from a website for filing your taxes online.

Some dizzy broad named MONTAVITA thinks that my email address, which I've had for 12 years, is suddenly her email address.

If I didn't fear the law, I swear I'd try to get her tax return deposited into my bank account.

Then, in the same day, I got some forward with some stupid joke about a priest sipping vodka and I didn't recognize any of the names, nor the sender. So Montavita is perhaps giving her "new" email address out?

Wow, it's been awhile since someone thought that putting their first name + @aol.com automatically means that's their email address. I used to get emails all the time from people thinking I was their aunt or their sister or their mom or their long-lost friend. And then I'd politely tell them to please check their email address, and they'd think I was pulling their leg or having them on or what-have-you.

Now I'm a grumpy old coot and I wish people would learn that this is my damn email address, not theirs.

And Montavita is a stupid name.

Why are you in Tavie's head? 9:02 PM | shower me with attention

Dammit dammit dammit.

Why are you in Tavie's head? 1:36 AM | shower me with attention

Monday, January 30, 2006

Tonight my goal is to get some R.E.M. sleep. I didn't last night. Last night was very annoying.

Someone called me at 1 in the morning just as I was drifting off and didn't leave a message and I didn't recognize the number so I'm thinking it was a wrong number. I actually called them back and asked who it was and they were like "Huh?" so I just hung up.

If you want to, call 718-608-5089 and find out who the hell that was and tell them to not call people at 1 in the morning.

Anyway, it fucked me up for sleeping so I spent the night literally tossing and hovering just above or below the sleep line.

I can't get Last Train to Clarksville out of my head.

It's the next night and I'm still not sleepy.

Something smells gross. Why can I suddenly smell stuff?

Why are you in Tavie's head? 10:53 PM | shower me with attention

Sunday, January 29, 2006

Today I gave blood for the first time. Gina was volunteering for the Red Cross in Hoboken and asked Cheryl and me to come meet her for lunch, and when I got there I ended up donating blood. It was interesting. My favourite part was that I got to have juice and a cookie after. (CARBS!!!)

Why are you in Tavie's head? 3:51 PM | shower me with attention

Saturday, January 28, 2006

For the last time: Riley is NOT, I repeat, NOT named after this character; he was named after this character.

Not Blucas; Foley. Never Blucas. Never, never.

Ick.

Why are you in Tavie's head? 9:07 PM | shower me with attention

Last Tuesday I wrote:

My newest addiction is Web Boggle. I got Gina addicted to.

I can't believe that's been there all week. I'm ashamed. Let me restate:

My newest addiction is Web Boggle. I got Gina addicted, too.

Why are you in Tavie's head? 9:02 PM | shower me with attention

I went over to my parents' place last night to visit my Dad and the kitties. Mom and I watched Forty-Year-Old Virign (hilarious!) and Dad took me to dinner at Trellis.

That is all I have to report.

Why are you in Tavie's head? 8:41 PM | shower me with attention

Thursday, January 26, 2006

I had a frightening nightmare - a frightmare, if you will - last night. It was so frightening it woke me from sleep. It involved Steph (my best friend of 20 years) forcing me to watch Tim Burton's Batman with her.

In real life, I have always been afraid of Jack Nicholson's Joker. He freaks me the fuck out. In the dream, this was only amplified. I haven't seen the movie in years so I can't recall if there actually is a scene where the Joker makes a poisonous gas leak out among innocent victims, but in my dream, I was suddenly in a subway car and bright red smoke started issuing from the vents and I knew it would kill me.

In the dream, the Joker also was displeased with a large, anthropomorphic cat (think Gideon from Pinocchio, but live-action) and proceeded to break his kneecaps in a most gruesome and graphic a fashion. I asked Steph if we please, please, mightn't watch something nicer, like The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe, but she insisted that I watch Batman, which in my dream, was just all scary Joker trying to get me.

So, no more yogurt cheese before bed.

In other news, our futon broke last night. It's been going for awhile and last night it collapsed from underneath Cheryl and Mushahid. Now there's just a large futon mattress on the floor at right angles to our couch, which is suddenly the primest real estate in the apartment...

Why are you in Tavie's head? 8:11 PM | shower me with attention

Wednesday, January 25, 2006

Today I thought of a sentence that no one has ever thought of before:

The mongoose, farting with displeasure, gathered his jellybeans for another go at the roulette table.

I think I'm going insane.

Why are you in Tavie's head? 7:33 PM | shower me with attention

Tuesday, January 24, 2006

Holy shit, Chris Penn is dead?! WTF???

Why are you in Tavie's head? 10:52 PM | shower me with attention

My newest addiction is Web Boggle. I got Gina addicted to.

We are losers and we love it.

Why are you in Tavie's head? 8:22 PM | shower me with attention

Monday, January 23, 2006

Today was the most boring day ever.

Why are you in Tavie's head? 7:22 PM | shower me with attention

Sunday, January 22, 2006

Oh glorious lazy Sunday of doing nothing all day long but watch television and read and do crossword puzzles and eat eat eat. Do you know that if you eat low-carb foods in great quantities, you might as well just have some damn chips? Well despite the fact that I do know that, I indulged my bizarre and shifting cravings all day long. Salad, lentil soup, peanut butter, yogurt cheese, eggs, low carb toast, sweet gherkins, vegetable moo shu. It was a low-carb+low-carb+low-carb=HIGHCARB bonanza. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm just fucking weird. And oddly, I have had no meat today. Living with vegetarians is getting to me.

Camille was here to watch Serenity and got sucked into our vortex of laziness and eating. It was absolutely sublime.

The sublimest part: a clean apartment. It was all reward for yesterday's elbow grease. Today, Gina and I enjoyed the fruits of our labours.

God, I love this apartment.

I am such a hermit.

Why are you in Tavie's head? 10:22 PM | shower me with attention

Cleaned my links up.

Why are you in Tavie's head? 6:00 PM | shower me with attention

LINN'SCOMINGLINN'SCOMINGLINN'SCOMINGLINN'SCOMINGLINN'SCOMING
LINN'SCOMINGLINN'SCOMINGLINN'SCOMINGLINN'SCOMING
LINN'SCOMINGLINN'SCOMINGLINN'SCOMINGLINN'SCOMING
LINN'SCOMINGLINN'SCOMINGLINN'SCOMINGLINN'SCOMING
LINN'SCOMINGLINN'SCOMINGLINN'SCOMINGLINN'SCOMING!!!!!!!!!!!

Why are you in Tavie's head? 2:35 PM | shower me with attention

Friday, January 20, 2006

This article about teenage/young-adult shut-ins in Japan made me cry.

Why are you in Tavie's head? 11:33 PM | shower me with attention

So. Dry.

Why are you in Tavie's head? 11:33 PM | shower me with attention

Thursday, January 19, 2006

I meant to mention that today started with me spilling hot coffee - grounds, filter and all-- all over the sleeve of my ivory sweater, and the lunchroom floor.

But it ended with me getting tickets to LA to see the Kids in the Hall. So things evened out.

Oh. I'm jinxing it, aren't I. Something hideous is going to happen between now and bedtime.

Why are you in Tavie's head? 8:28 PM | shower me with attention

A Dippity Doo* accidentally called me "baby" today. It was hilarious, he was so embarrassed. It was just like when you're a little kid and you accidentally call your teacher "Mommy".

I just booked our tickets to LA for the KITH shows - I am now broke as hell and so freaking excited!!

* Member of sales dept.

Why are you in Tavie's head? 7:36 PM | shower me with attention

Wednesday, January 18, 2006

Welcome home, Mom, what did you bring me?

I know you're reading this, you damn rapscallion, you. Go away.

What did you bring me? And how sad was Disney World without me?

Why are you in Tavie's head? 11:08 PM | shower me with attention

So, now it's Official, now I can be Officially Publicly Excited: The Kids in the Hall are doing 3 nights of shows in L.A. in February.

I hope I hope I hope I can get to one of these shows.

Now off to spread the word. I feel like a little bee; they're not advertising this show except by word-of-mouth so I must go buzz around now.

Why are you in Tavie's head? 10:42 PM | shower me with attention

Tuesday, January 17, 2006

Did you see? Did you see? My tv boyfriend won a Golden Globe!

Why are you in Tavie's head? 7:11 PM | shower me with attention

Monday, January 16, 2006

I'm getting another cold.

&^(*$^@#*$&%^#%(&@}%#*(%_*#%_#

Why are you in Tavie's head? 8:16 PM | shower me with attention

Sunday, January 15, 2006

I saw Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire again tonight. This time on IMAX. And I still wasn't bored. It's just the best movie. Just so good. Except for that apalling lack-of-Alan-Rickman-screen-time problem.

We finally took down Christmas today, too.

Why are you in Tavie's head? 2:23 AM | shower me with attention

Saturday, January 14, 2006

Oh hell, I have to get myself to LA at the end of February. How the heck am I gonna pull this off?

Why are you in Tavie's head? 12:01 AM | shower me with attention

Thursday, January 12, 2006

I sit right next to the fire exit at work. They painted the stairwell outside of it, and the doorframe on our side, in some thick and heinous oily I bet-there's-lead-in-it paint.

Except I can't really smell anything, not even the fumes that are making everyone else around me gag and list. I honestly can't smell it. Everyone once in awhile, out of nowhere, I'll get a whiff that'll turn my stomach, but most of the day I don't notice it. Except for the headaches. And the slight nausea. Both of which may well be caused by caffeine deprivation at any given moment.

I guess that if anyone in the office should be sitting closest to this stuff, it's me. But I wonder if we're all gonna get cancer or start sprouting a third eye or our hair will fall out. How long does this shit take to dry, already?

Why are you in Tavie's head? 9:16 PM | shower me with attention

Wednesday, January 11, 2006

My parents invited me for dinner and I have opted to spend the night. The Stinka and I are reunited!

Why are you in Tavie's head? 10:39 PM | shower me with attention

R. at work is having a baby soon and I'd been procrastinating on knitting booties for her forever but I finally finished last night, just in time for her baby shower today. And my present got the biggest "AWWWWWWWWW..."

It was very inspiring. Maybe this year I'll actually finish one of those damn projects.

Why are you in Tavie's head? 7:50 PM | shower me with attention

Monday, January 09, 2006

Cingular is my BITCH! My friend Adam got me a shiny new phone to replace my, er, laundered one, and I called Cingular to have my number transferred and they told me I couldn't because I was still under my AT&T Wireless plan (even though they're the same damn company now.)

So I accepted defeat and everything. Then I watched two episodes of The Facts of Life, and, perhaps inspired by Mrs. Garrett's determination and feistiness, I went and took the old SIM card out of my broken phone and put it in my new phone and it works.

TAKE THAT, PHONE COMPANY BITCHES!!!

Why are you in Tavie's head? 1:09 AM | shower me with attention

Sunday, January 08, 2006

After the beef brawl there was dinner with Mom in the old neighbourhood and a confession of a wish to break a wine bottle over my head, and moody distance, but ultimate reconciliation, with the help of the contents of said bottle and the bottle-redhead singing at Tommaso's, who sang the song from On the Town that Matt (a.k.a. My Little Love or Our Lady of the Perpetual Not Answering My Emails) sang directly to me from his high school stage that time.

Now she (Her, not the bottle-redhead singer) is on her way back to Japan. Mrrrrffffffff.

Why are you in Tavie's head? 2:50 PM | shower me with attention

Friday, January 06, 2006

Thanks, Mike and Gina. I love you guys.

Why are you in Tavie's head? 10:51 PM | shower me with attention

Thursday, January 05, 2006

Welcome to my traditional post-department-dinner drunken blog post. Tonight I had a lot of steak. I almost finished half of it. It was a big-ass steak. I couldn't finish half, and you've seen my big ass and you know I can eat a lot and thus it was one big-ass steak.

Today I spilled tea all over Mon Capitan's desk. It was very traumatic. I didn't mean to do it. I felt bad. But after that we went to the department dinner and I had 2 drinks and a big-ass steak and I felt better. Do you know why I call him Mon Capitan? Because that's what Q called Picard and I am QUEEN OF THE GEEKS!

Two people figured out what my favourite piece of music was, and they figured out by downloading the damn thing and looking at the artist. So I'll tell you: my favourite piece of music is the music that's played over the credits of the movie Wargames. It really is, I've loved it for years, ask my sister. I love it so much that one time I held up a tape recorder to the tv and taped it off the tv and played and replayed the tape for years and years. Once a good friend (who's no longer a friend) found out I loved it and actually tracked down the movie soundtrack, which was very hard to find, and dubbed a cassette of it for me. I still have it... somewhere...

Thus concludes my traditional post-department-dinner drunken blog post. Goodnight evrabuddy!

Why are you in Tavie's head? 11:39 PM | shower me with attention

I spent a few precious hours with Goose tonight; we had dinner at Mary Ann's and went to the Emily Hubley thing at MoMa. I like her cartoons a lot. She turned out to be the lady whose cute knitted bag I had been admiring in the lobby. I want to knit a bag. Specifically, this one.

Mike is here and leaves Sunday; Kirsten leaves Sunday; Goose leaves Sunday; I think Sunday is Black Sunday.

Why are you in Tavie's head? 12:11 AM | shower me with attention

Wednesday, January 04, 2006

Happy Dave day!

Why are you in Tavie's head? 12:00 AM | shower me with attention

Tuesday, January 03, 2006

There is no sleep.

Why are you in Tavie's head? 1:43 AM | shower me with attention

Monday, January 02, 2006

This is my favourite piece of music in the world.

Do you know what it is? Huh, you geek? (Don't post the answer if you do, I want to see how many people know it. Email me.)

You geeks.

Why are you in Tavie's head? 1:20 AM | shower me with attention

Sunday, January 01, 2006

Tonight is a caffeine-deprived, groggy goil's night at home with champagne and board games. I slept all day, could barely rouse myself even with coffee, my sinuses are dying, but I'm back on the low-carb.

Tomorrow I have to take my Dad to see Harry Potter, I've been promising him for months and put it off yet again so tomorrow I really have to.

Spike is humping the afghan again and it's grossing everyone out.

Why are you in Tavie's head? 6:59 PM | shower me with attention