tavie.com

Oh, you know, I'm really into screwing myself over. That's why, after weeks and weeks, I still haven't called any new doctor to make an appointment with the goal of getting a new prescription for the antidepressants that I require to survive. Those antidepressants that I've been on since I was a teenager, the only ones that have ever worked well. Those antidepressants that make me horribly sick and miserable if I miss a single dose (a by-now well-known side effect that has spawned class-action lawsuits, I believe.)

But I'm so into screwing myself over that I let my last emergency prescription dwindle to nothing, and had to miss today's dose so I'll have the last dose to make it through tomorrow. Luckily, my mother and I are on the same medication, and she's got an appointment with her doc tomorrow to get a new prescription.

So I've spent a terribly wasted day feeling wasted. I got a third of my Latin done and I can't stand to do any more. I can't even stand to stand up. I've been screaming at everyone and bursting into tears at the slightest frustration. From one missed dose.

Shit, I hate this stuff.

Tomorrow I've decided, if I do nothing else, I will call my mother's psychiatrist and try to make myself an appointment with her. That doesn't interfere with school, work or my trip to Amsterdam next week.

Shit. I'm so happy.

Why are you in Tavie's head? 8:04 PM | shower me with attention