tavie.com

Two people who were very important in my life are gone. They were both extended family to me. They're not dead but they're gone from my life. The lack of closure is making me increasingly depressed. The part of me that believed in the permanence of love is rotting off.

I don't believe in the permanence of good things anymore, like uncles and best friends, but I do believe in the permanence of depression and hopelessness. What stupid luck.

What I'd really like to do is listen to Whatever right now. Some nice old-fashioned wallowing would be nice. Good, bitter wallowing music would be ideal. Nothing would be more right at this moment than the last track on that album. But where are my CDs? I don't know, since apparently I don't listen to music anymore.

Instead I will go wallow in my new holy trinity, ritually worshipped nightly from 4 to 5:30: Perfect Strangers, Head of the Class and Family Ties.

Why are you in Tavie's head? 4:04 AM | shower me with attention