tavie.com

We came out of Home Depot to a sunshower, golden and delicious, and turned around and saw the huge, full-arched rainbow, bright bright bright, and drove home under the rainbow, singing of the good songs and breathing in the beauty, and the rainbow melted into gold-n-silver pearlescent clouds, which turned into the most heartbreakingly glorious sunset I've seen in years. I welled up, I actually welled up tears at its beauty. It almost hurt to look at it, it was so beautiful.

This points to a happy June.

Why are you in Tavie's head? 8:20 PM | shower me with attention

Gina is mowing the lawn and tomorrow we'll finish painting the dining room. Fans are whirring and breezes are blowing and Mac and Me, an oddly depressing children's movie I remember watching in grade school-- literally, in grade school, in a classroom-- is on the tv, and sun's out (kangaroos!) and it's summer. It's summer, it is.

It's summer!

I'm feeling very good-morning-starshine-sunsunsunshineyday-sweeping-the-clouds-away-on-my-way-to-hot-time-summer-in-the-city. Don't spoil it by, say, asking me when I'm coming home (soon, when my cash runs out, before you graduate this week but I have to be back by Friday because on Friday Kitana will be here...)

Why are you in Tavie's head? 3:15 PM | shower me with attention

Hmm. Why the fuck not?

So, my favourite moment, I think, from the entire tour, perhaps, took place in San Francisco. It was after the second show on Sunday night, the one where Mr Himelfarb decreed that all the fans who showed up at the Virgin signing should get tickets and aftershow passes for aforementioned performance. So I was with my big posse, and we were lined up, and I was uncomfortable as I always am in the aftershow situations-- but not horribly so, not so that I was going to pull my friends away from the experience, and besides which, I did want to see my favourite guys, even in a weird lining-up type situation. So my group was in front of me, and I sort of lagged behind them, waiting on line, feeling weird, sagging tiredly against the wall. It felt like 4:30 a.m. to my body, and for once, that felt late to me. I leaned in a narrow doorway, my eyes half-closed, and Mark, who had been outside posing for pictures with some other fans, came towards me to edge past and get into the main room, and as he did, he caught my eye and paused by me just long enough to squeeze my arm. It was a small, perfect gesture. The fact that he did this, so naturally, made me feel so appreciated and so much more comfortable to be there that I can still scarcely believe it happened. Of course it did, because Mark always manages to do something like that. I really do love that guy.

Why are you in Tavie's head? 12:59 AM | shower me with attention

Friday, May 31, 2002

I wish it was raining. I would like to walk in some rain.

Why are you in Tavie's head? 3:33 PM | shower me with attention

She's safe in LA and settling in. And she met... Keith Hobbs' older brother? Small world? Crazy? Why do I remember Keith Hobbs' name? Simple! Why wouldn't I?

I'm weird.

It's getting very Six Degrees of Separation in here... someone open a window...

Thank god for blogging. Keep it up, Ags, if you're not planning to call me once in awhile... ;)

Why are you in Tavie's head? 3:26 PM | shower me with attention

(And I saw an old, bearded man wearing red long johns and a shiny red bathroom rollerblade past me on my way here this afternoon, so really, how can I not love Amsterdam?)

I am getting very excited about this trip.

Why are you in Tavie's head? 3:22 PM | shower me with attention

It's 3 o'clock in the morning and I've done nothing useful. I've even missed Family Ties.

I decided today that I need to get a pair of Tootie-style roller skates and learn how to skate. I have very dim memories of trips with various day camps to roller rinks in the 80's, and perhaps my memory is being deceitful when it tells me that I did not spend the entire time clinging to the railing in these places-- or perhaps it is lying, lying like a dog-- but I don't think I'm completely incapable of learning. Not completely. Just mostly.

And, no, not roller-blading. I tried that once, fell on my ass. Never again. Thank you; don't try to convince me. Old-style Tootie roller skates have got to be easier to work with.

Likely this fancy will pass by the time this episode of Three's Company has ended and M*A*S*H has begun. (But in case it doesn't, my birthday is in six weeks and I'm shoe size ladies' 10.)

Why are you in Tavie's head? 3:07 AM | shower me with attention

Thursday, May 30, 2002

The world is just a great big onion
And hate and fear are the spices
that make you cry, oh baby.
And the only way to get rid of this great big onion
is to plant love seeds.
-"Tamanegi No Happy Song", Shena Ringo

Today I went to see my little love and the magnificent Anika perform their production of "The Chairs". The play was very depressing, very Godot ("Yah, that's the point-- Theatre of the Absurd," sez my educated sister, also in attendance), very well done indeed. They're amazing actors, those kids. I think I worship them.

My other object of worship was also in attendance. She was wearing a Minnie Mouse sweatshirt that my fifth grade teacher used to wear. The Ms. Mannix Shirt, I calls it. I tried to flick a spitball at her but sis stopped me; my aim was all wrong and I would have hit an innocent. I throw like a retarded girl. Instead, I cornered her, hugged her against her wishes, and then hugged the amused-but-slightly-alarmed-looking Mother Goose, and now I am back. I can stay a few days longer because I scraped out the last of my checking account and finally changed the Canadian money I've been carrying around in my wallet for months.

Gina bought me a steak, and it was good.

Why are you in Tavie's head? 9:00 PM | shower me with attention

sarah said:

hello, new desktop

Funny you say that, because yesterday I was downloading Craig's tour pictures to Gina's computer and accidentally made this one the desktop; 'course it looked so good that it had to stay.

Why are you in Tavie's head? 8:53 PM | shower me with attention

Wednesday, May 29, 2002

If you want it, here it is
But it's goin' fast
So get your badfinger
Out of your bad ass...

Tomorrow has me off to the city to see Matt's play. Then back here for more Trading Spaces marathons, chipless taco salads, and lazing around not doing anything at all useful.

Need a job, need money, am getting all knotted up about it, but not yet doing anything about it. Will have to go home soon and beg for money; they may withhold it to keep me at home. (They are jealous that I am always at Gina's, where it is clean and there is no yelling, except for mock-yelling at Riley.) Am worried about how little money I will have to spend in Europe, but am more worried at trying to find a job that will begin and end before I go to Sweden. Won't happen.

I hate money, I hate worrying about money, and I hate not having money. I also hate owing people (like Steve, who is being great about it!) money, which is why I can't stay here and let Gina feed me much longer, even though I want to.

Would anyone care to hire me? I can type really fast and I can belch on cue.

This post was brought to you by the letter M and the number 0.

Why are you in Tavie's head? 11:45 PM | shower me with attention

"She's a pretty girl with a dark secret."
-Rynn, on her spankin' lovin' cat, Joss

"Dave Foley is left-wing!"
-Excited Girl, autograph in hand, fleeing Mark McKinney at the Virgin Megastore signing in San Francisco

Why are you in Tavie's head? 3:36 PM | shower me with attention

The best show I saw in Vegas took place at the Treasure Island hotel and casino. It wasn't the Pirate show, although the Pirate show was indeed hilarious ("These standing cutthroats have the cheek to fly the Jolly Roger!" "Avast, ye son of a footman's goat!"), but took place on a little bridge above a little manmade moat outside the hotel lobby. The stars of the show were two pissed-off looking young women and two exhausted-looking hotel employees in sweat-stained hotel uniforms. One girl stood with her arms crossed, glaring at the gathered crowd. The other looked embarrassed. One hotel employee stood just inside the railing, clinging to the back of the shirt of the second hotel employee, who was teetering on the very edge of the bridge on the other side of the railing, swishing a very long pole with a net attached to the end in and out of the water. Second Employee looked as if he would fall in any second. The objects of his exertion were one black purse and one silver cell phone, both of which rested at the bottom of the moat.

I joined the crowd of spectators with unabashed delight, and when Angry Girl sneered, "It's not a show!", I replied gleefully, "Oh yes it IS a show, it's the best show I've seen all weekend!" Although Kirsten and Gina quickly grew bored with the spectacle, I was unable to leave, and insisted on staying until Second Employee finally succeeded in scooping up the cell phone and the waterlogged pocketbook. I then tried to lead the dispersing crowd in a round of applause, but no one else was having it.

Poop to 'em, is what I say. It was the most impressive thing I saw all weekend.

Why are you in Tavie's head? 3:32 PM | shower me with attention

More more more! Get to the touching already!

Why are you in Tavie's head? 3:21 PM | shower me with attention

Tuesday, May 28, 2002

Backwards?

(Crazy going slowly am I, 6-5-4-3-2-1...)

Had lunch with Steph and Erica (and Kirsten) today near Wall Street. Don't see either of them much and now Erica is going to California for two months. She called me "My Tavie" when she hugged me goodbye today, which moved me.

Got back from Whirlwind Vegas Extravaganza yesterday. It was fun, exhausting, sweaty, bright. Very packed. We spent most of the day-and-a-half wandering up and down the strip, feeding quarters to slot machines. Most of the machines ate our quarters greedily and belched nary a "thank you", but one of the machines spit $200 into Gina's waiting hands. That was very nice of it.

Tara and Nicole are very much the pumpkins. I loved every minute with them. They didn't make me nervous or too-shy at all. Nicole and I have so much in common that it's a little scary; if I were to list the similarities you wouldn't believe it. Her feet are so tiny. Tara is so easy to talk to, so fun. She and Gina spent a lot of time at the head of the group, leading the way. Our room at the Aladdin got upgraded because we had to wait for it, and consequently, we got an enormous fucking bathroom with the biggest bathtub I've ever seen. Gina, who misses her claw-foot tub from her old apartment the Breadbox (Mint Manor is woefully lacking in the bathtub department), immediately bought some sweet-smelling bubblebath and most of us, one after another, took turns soaking in the enormous tub. That was my favourite part of Vegas.

My mom made my Sweden reservations today. I'll be gone from June 19 until July 13. I'm pretty nervous. That's a long time in a new country. But Linn will hold my hand.

I am now out of money and my cycle of begging my mom for scraps of change and owing Gina for meals has begun.

I really, really want to see Into the Woods and hoping Tante Joan will bestow tickets upon me as a birthday gift, even though I'll be in Sweden on my actual birthday.

Why are you in Tavie's head? 10:47 PM | shower me with attention

Monday, May 27, 2002

Home. Strange sleeping. Have to go meet Steph and Erica in Staten Island in a couple of hours. Then back here. Strange sleeping. Strange trip. Fun. More on it later.

Feeling overwhelming post-tour sadness now. Came on suddenly from Craig's journal entry and won't quit. Real-life is here and Europe with my Swedish Sister looms, and more fun with my dear ones, and job-getting and summer sunshine, but all I can do is miss the excitement and the particular kind of joy and exhaustion that the tour brought. Even having felt so much less in the middle of it than last time, so much closer to the "fan" side than the "what am I doing here?" side-- or maybe because of that?-- but I know from experience that it can't all be tour-time, that we need our friend-time and work-time and life-time apart from that kind of excitement. Yes, and because I'm melancholy I'll quote Sondheim, who sums it up best, and because I'm a Sondheim-quoting sort of person.

Oh, if life were made of moments...
Even now and then a bad one?
But if life were only moments
then you'd never know you had one...

And, then, NewsRadio's Lisa Miller and my post-tour mantra from days of yore:

"It's never over, Dave."

Why are you in Tavie's head? 7:04 PM | shower me with attention