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The Night Erin Saved Christmas
Once upon a time in Mint Manor
some stupid girls didn't know how to hook up a VCR.
They flipped through the TiVo manual, scratching their heads with confusion.
So many cables! So many wires!
One of them fled in despair to the soothing, smoky embrace of the barbecue sauce pools of Kansas City.
The other one sat alone in front of the television, weeping.
"However will we have Christmas without The Muppet Family Christmas?
Pee Wee's Christmas Special?
Mickey's Christmas Carol?
Why aren't they on DVD?
Without these videocassettes, my family will have to spend watching bad marathons!"
All of a sudden, there was a burst of bright green light from the fireplace and the scent of expensive face cream and candy canes filled the room,
and out stepped an elf named Erin.
Her pointy-toed, bell-tipped elf shoes danced lightly across the carpet.
She jumped spryly over a sleeping cat.
She glanced dismissively at the crying girl and wordlessly twinkled over on tippy-tippy toes to the mass of wires and consoles that was the entertainment unit.
Bending at the waist, her hands waved over the entertainment unit like the small cartoon hands of Charles Schulz characters waving over a skinny Christmas tree,
and, o miracle,
o wonder,
o Christmas joy,
when her hands stopped waving, there behind them stood a wondrous sight:
not a Christmas tree,
but a VCR that said "PLAY"
and a tv screen that played what was in the VCR.
"But," gasped Tavie, "does the TiVo still work?!"
And wordlessly, the elf pressed a button, and lo they did see that it did.

And that is how Erin the Elf saved Christmas.

Why are you in Tavie's head? 10:30 PM | shower me with attention