this trip was hard but worth it. i'm at mint manor right now, an impromtu trip as i didn't know if the buses would be running what with the port authority being closed for quite a while. this week was exhausting emotionally and of course that transferred to physical fatigue. tuesday was the worst; i could have fallen asleep at my desk by the end of the day after the shock of being under attack and the three to four panic-stricken hours worrying about tavie and if she was okay. i went home for lunch and immediately logged on. linn im'ed me and told me tavie was okay. when i went back to work, i verbalized my amazement at the internet and how my friend in *sweden* could tell me my friend in *new york* was okay : )

one of the hardest things this trip was taking the PATH...we always got off at the WTC and the detour around was an unwelcome reminder. we went to union square and there were about 200-300 people gathered and dozens of candle arrangements with pictures and poems and tributes. all over the place we saw missing person flyers, many of which we recognized from the news. there was a donation site there and i brought to them the suitcase i had been lugging around the city all day with toothbrushes, toothpaste, batteries, pads, bacitracin, etc. then we also went to walgreens and brought them water, gatorade, more batteries, cigarettes... some generous donor even gave them beer.

the following is a song that was written by a bandmate about 4-5 years ago when he was in another band. it was originally written about veterans who lost their lives fighting for our country. now, to me, it takes on a whole new meaning...

One Fallen Hero

will i be alone
will i need a friend
something to ease the pain
prisoner of your fate

i smash the silence
with my hands of time
looking into the past
the future will be a guess

falling down, endless space
between you and the ground
i can't help but fall with you
i worship the ground you fall to

now as i reach for you
i feel you slipping away
now as i grip for you
i feel your power decay
to one fallen hero

so kiss away the pain
make it okay again
behind my face the shame
and i feel the world's to blame

the only dream i have
is when my time is through
i'll dance with you again
i long to be with you

this gate i must pass through
seems like the only way
why must it fade away
to one fallen hero

this destiny is for you
seems like the only way
these paths we choose are strange
in this hero's role

a bad case of verbal diarrhea from Cheryl 23:13